Nonviolent Adult Sons of Abused Women: Ending the Cycle of Violence

Purpose:  This qualitative study aimed to elicit nonviolent adult sons’ (N=13) perceptions of what helped them to recover from childhood exposure to domestic violence. Intergenerational transmission of violence is an important area of study because of its legacy of destruction and devastation; however, wider examination of psychosocial outcomes is necessary to gain a more complete picture of psychosocial functioning for adult children of abused women, in general, and for males who end the cycle of violence, in particular.  The study’s main research question was:  What are the key issues and patterns within the recovery process for nonviolent adult sons of abused women? 

Methods:  Since the intent of this study was to discover how one recovers from childhood exposure to domestic violence, grounded theory was particularly suited as its purpose is to identify complex and hidden psychosocial processes with the goal of developing theory.   The sample was drawn from a large mixed methods study regarding recovery in adult children (N=86; females, n=68; males, n=18) exposed to IPV during their childhood.  Of the 18 males who completed in-depth interviews, 13 were selected for the current study as they had not been abusive to an intimate partner or a child, had directly experienced abuse as a child, and had normative mental health as assessed by standardized measures of functioning. 

Participants were males ranging in age from 23 to 60 years old (M=34, SD=11). The majority were Caucasian (n=12) and one was African American.  Educationally, three had some college (two of which were currently enrolled) and ten participants had completed a bachelor’s and/or master’s degrees. Concerning child witnessing experiences, approximately half of the participants (n=7) were exposed to the abuser’s violence for 10 or more years.   Abusers included fathers (n=9) and stepfathers (n=4). All participants reported experiencing verbal and physical child abuse.   Data analysis was conducted using a constant comparative method; a qualitative procedure that identifies and extracts significant statements or “meaningful units” from in-depth interview transcripts to be conceptualized and reconstructed in new ways.   Data were coded and organized by two researchers using the qualitative data analysis program, Dedoose. 

Results:  The core phenomenon that emerged from the data included strategies used by participants to transform childhood experiences of powerlessness into an empowered adult self.   Although recovery from childhood exposure to domestic violence is highly individualized, analysis of participants’ transcripts revealed five important themes related to this transformation process:  1) committing to a life of nonviolence, including choosing to act differently than their parents, 2) understanding and accepting childhood realities, including their fathers/stepfathers’ abusive actions, 3) choosing to forgive parents, 4) navigating adult child-parental contact, particularly limiting exposure to violence and dysfunction, and 5) accessing informal and formal support networks, especially therapeutic.  

Implications:  This study’s findings underscore how the link between witnessing violence between parents, indoctrination of patriarchal values, experiencing early childhood violence, and later adult partner aggression is complex.  Additional research is needed to further ascertain what mediating mechanisms promote or deter intergenerational transmission of violence for adult sons of abused women.